How do I prepare my children for a move?

Preparing Children for a Move

Moving house is a significant life event that can be particularly unsettling for children. Careful preparation and communication help minimise disruption and foster a positive attitude towards the new home and area. Tailoring the approach to the child's age and understanding is key.

Early Communication is Crucial

Children should be informed about the impending move as early as possible, once the decision is firm. For younger children, a few weeks' notice might suffice, while older children and teenagers benefit from more time to process the change. Explain the reasons for the move clearly and calmly, answering any questions honestly.

• For toddlers and pre-schoolers: Focus on simple, reassuring language. Talk about their new bedroom and nearby park.
• For primary school age: Involve them in discussions about the new house features, such as a garden for playing or a bigger room.
• For teenagers: Address concerns about changing schools, leaving friends, and maintaining social connections. Acknowledge their feelings and offer support.

Involve Children in the Moving Process

Giving children age-appropriate tasks helps them feel a part of the move rather than simply being moved. This sense of agency can reduce anxiety.

• Decluttering: Allow them to decide what toys or clothes they wish to keep, donate, or discard. This can be framed as preparing for new adventures.
• Packing their room: Provide them with their own boxes for packing personal items. Label these boxes clearly with their name and "Open First" or similar, so they can easily find their cherished belongings upon arrival. Consider a special box for immediate needs on moving day.
• Decorating the new room: Let them choose paint colours or decide on furniture arrangement for their new bedroom.

Familiarisation with the New Location

Reducing the unknown elements of a move helps children adapt more quickly.

• Visit the new home: If feasible, take children to see the new house and garden. Point out where their bedroom will be.
• Explore the area: Walk around the new neighbourhood. Locate local parks, shops, and their new school. Highlight positive aspects like a nearby ice cream parlour or sports facilities.
• Online exploration: Use maps or online photos to show them the new area, including routes to school or local attractions.

Maintain Routines and Comforts

Consistency provides a sense of security during a period of change. Sticking to regular meal times, bedtimes, and school routines is recommended as much as possible before, during, and after the move.

Ensure a bag of essential items for each child is readily accessible on moving day. This should include favourite toys, books, comfort blankets, and pyjamas. This helps create a familiar anchor in the initial stages of unpacking.

Moving Day Strategies

On the day of the move, consider having children stay with a trusted friend or family member if possible. This keeps them safe and out of the way of the removals team, allowing the adults to focus on the logistics.

If children are present, assign them a "safe zone" in the house where they can play quietly away from the activity of loading the lorry. Provide snacks and activities. Ensure they understand the process, especially when their bedroom items are being moved.

Settling into the New Home

Prioritise unpacking children's bedrooms as soon as possible. Making their space feel familiar helps them settle in quickly. The first room to unpack for families is often a child's bedroom or a central play area.

Spend time together exploring the new house and garden. Set up playdates with local children once settled. Remember to address safety concerns by planning how to childproof the new home, especially for younger children.

Encourage children to express their feelings about the move. Patience and understanding are important if they show signs of sadness or frustration. Organising opportunities to meet neighbours and connect with their new community can also aid their adjustment.